Friday, January 31, 2014

ERNIE




His name is Ernie and he was born in Czechoslovakia in 1930.  We met him when my family moved to Reno, Nevada in the late 1960’s.  Mom and Dad bought a brand new house in the Virginia Foothills area and he and his wife, Rosemarie, were our neighbors. German was their native language, and although their English was fluent, they never lost their charming accents.   My parents became very good friends with them and threw lots of cocktail and dinner parties together, either at their home or ours.  I knew Ernie had lived in Europe during World War II, but he never wanted to talk about it, didn't want to relive unspeakable memories.  
 They both had wonderful senses of humor, were irreverent, and highly entertaining. I can still see Rosemarie sitting by the fireplace in our living room, gesturing with her cocktail glass as she told some off color joke.  I hear her boisterous, throaty laughter as she delivered the punch line.
Aunt Doris with Rosemarie, 1999

 I babysat their son and daughter along with my own little sister for a while, and when I was 15, Ernie got me my first job in a restaurant downtown he was managing.  He was a highly sought after employee and held prestigious positions as a Maitre‘d in some of the largest casinos in Reno and Tahoe through the years.  He met all the famous headliners, including Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr., and I loved hearing his stories about celebrities.  Sometimes my parents would take us out to dinner where he was working and I was impressed with his elegant attire, his confidence and poise.  He had no problem telling his employers if he was displeased and would not tolerate being talked down to. I think he changed jobs a lot.

After I spent a year in Germany, I was able to talk to Ernie and Rosemarie in their native language.  I eventually moved to San Diego, but always enjoyed visiting them when I came back to see my parents.
After Dad died in 1999, they both tried to reach out to Mom, but she was having her own issues and their friendship fell apart.  
When the Witchcreek Fire came barreling through our neighborhood in 2007, Rosemarie called my cell phone to make sure we were OK.  When I told her we’d lost our home, and I couldn’t stop thinking about all the things we’d lost, Rosemarie recited an old German proverb:  “If you’re always looking in the rearview mirror, you won’t get very far.”  

Ernie said, "Yes, it's bad that you lost everything, but imagine losing your home and seeing other people walking down the street wearing your own clothes."

When Mom died in 2008, they came to her funeral, and Rosemarie slipped in the snow and fell, injuring her leg.  This led to some serious infections, major illnesses and her eventual death last year.  Ernie was by her side until the very end and I know this must be a lonely time for him now.  He told my sister he wasn’t interested in dating any of the single women he’s met.  “If I want to look at wrinkles, I can just look in the mirror!”
Over Christmas vacation, my son and I drove to Reno where my sister is now living in our parents’ old house. 
Laura is glad to be back "home"

 I invited Ernie up for dinner one night and he seemed very happy to spend a few hours with us. 

My parents' house brought back many memories for him and he said how said it was that my mom and dad and his Rosemarie were no longer with us.  It was a very memorable evening, as Ernie entertained us with the fascinating story of his life and how he came to live in the US.  
 
Czechoslovakia, 1945, Internet photo
He was 15 when the war ended in 1945 and, he said, that’s when things got really ugly in his hometown.  The Czech gorilla army arrested his father and beat him so severely, he was never the same again. 
 
Internet photo

Ernie and his mom were forced to leave their home and all their possessions behind.  They were homeless for a while and scrappy Ernie found work wherever he could. They were starving. He remembered knocking on a neighbor's door - the building looked fine from the outside, but when the woman opened her front door, Ernie saw that there was no roof and no walls, just the facade. 
 
Theresienstadt, Czechoslovakia,during World War II.  Internet photo



He wandered to a neighboring town one day and saw a childhood friend standing in a window.  He called out to him and said he was so hungry and did he have any food.  Ludwig welcomed him inside, said he worked for a restaurant and could get him food.  His friend fed him, got him a job, and so began Ernie’s career in the food industry. 
Things eventually got better and Ernie moved, first to Canada, then to California in the 1950's where he fell in love and married the lovely Rosemarie.  They eventually moved to Reno and settled into the house where he still lives.   His parents were able to come visit him there too once or twice.
As I listened to him recall the atrocities of war and his efforts to survive, it became clear to me why he is so strong, resilient, and why he would never put up with someone talking down to him.  Why would he?  When you have seen and survived horror, why tolerate anything or anyone you don't like?
Ernie has a slender build and has always been fit and agile. He is in his 80’s now and retired, but still keeps very active, hiking through the Nevada hills with his German Shorthaired dog, and hunting.   
 
Looks like Ernie's dog. Internet photo

 Still, we were concerned about him walking home in the dark that cold night.  We offered to drive him or walk with him but he was adamant that he was perfectly capable of walking alone.  When we kept insisting, he pulled a small gun out of his pocket to show us he was prepared for any trouble!
Internet photo




 Ernie, you are my hero.